The phrase “Happy Holidays” is a common greeting in December, but it doesn’t describe the mindset of a lot of moms. If you’re overwhelmed right now, with a general sense of anxiety about time, a long to-do list, tons of activities and getting everything done, “happy” may not be among the words that best sum up your feelings.
There are, however, some simple ways to make this time of year more enjoyable.
- Do what you have to. Make a list (and check it twice) of everything that must be done – the gifts to buy, packages to wrap or mail, baking to do, lights to hang – whatever tasks that for you are non-negotiable. Try to figure out a rough timetable for each item, so you don’t end up with a pile of critical jobs still facing you at the eleventh hour.
- But don’t try to do it all. What can you delegate? What can you take a shortcut on or skip altogether? There’s no rule saying you have to bake the cookies that take you four hours. Moms are known to make themselves absolutely crazy with self-imposed “shoulds” that are completely unrealistic with small children at home. If you really don’t want to pull out every single box of decorations this year, no one besides you will know; give yourself a break if you need a little less on your plate.
- Think about what traditions you want to begin or continue with your children. Opportunities abound for good times and memory making. Even if money is tight, there’s lots of free fun to be had. Many neighborhoods have spectacular light displays that are sure to entertain everyone (among them Dovewood Court in Orangevale). Or keep things closer to home and spend an evening stringing popcorn for the tree or reading every holiday story you have in the house.
- But once again, moderation is key. There comes a point where one more craft, outing, celebration, party or visit to Santa is simply one too many. Each activity is fun, but focus on a few that you can truly enjoy rather than trying to cram every holiday offering into your already busy schedule. You’re setting yourself up for failure (and your youngsters for meltdowns) if you try to do it all.
- Get everyone’s input. Pick a handful of activities that sound fun to you, and let each child pick one that they’d like to do. Ask your husband what his favorite tradition from childhood was, and incorporate this. Think about what memories you most want to have from this month, and make time to create these.
When January rolls around, the most important thing won’t be recalling how many places you took your kids, or how many activities you all did. Instead, what you’ll want to remember is a month of having fun together, of joy rather than anxiety, of less rushing around and more focusing on the special times. Make this a month for Happy Holidays!
Your assignment: Look at the month ahead and think about what you want to do – and to skip – to make the season enjoyable and manageable for your family. Choose a few activities for you and your children, and figure out when to make these happen. Make time for what matters most, and give yourself permission to bypass those things that are more stressful than enjoyable.
